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Film image #59
2023, Acrylic on board, 30x30cm
[7 November 2022] You are in the present, in the sounds of the raindrops, the rumblings of the thunder. In the now, that slow-moving cursor, inevitably moving forward at an ordained speed, the inevitable march of time in the present is your solace. In the past are my regrets [rgrets], regrets [regrets] in the future are my fears. The past contains my regrets, not only my regrets, but [mu] my regrets are a constitutive part of my past, my future not yet in existence. My mind projects into the future, conjecturing, concerned, consternated, constantly, conspicuously, conspiringly inspiring fears. My being projects into the future, constructing things with things from my past, conjecturing about the things that will repeat again, the experiences that will repeat again, that may repeat in my [furure] future in the future [furor] fasting fast, the constant march of time, my voluble experience of time, my voluble perception [pf] of time, moving faster, moving slower, seemingly seemlessly [seamlessly], semantically, shamanic [sham] sam. Faces from my past return, another lesson lived to learn. I dreamt that my family members or my friends were raising [chetetahs] cheetahs on [leashes], they were walking around [withing] within their cheetahs on leashes, [cheatahs] cheetahs cheaters, do I think they are cheating? I dreamt that they could see my balls, which had slipped out of my shorts, sitting on the sofa. They were excited, grinning, smiling, active, leading their cheetahs on leashes, descending the staircase, the ornate staircase, the ostentatious [staorcase] staircase. I dreamt I was in a computer game, that my T-cell count was too low, [thst] that I could submit myself to [somones] someone's process of restoration, to gain life points in the computer game, the fantasy genre type of computer [gaome] game. In this painting, I see faces from the past, some talking, some smiling. I see two faces, one with a white [bead] beard, elvish, shining or [withinn] within a orb of light, talking, maybe shouting. I see another face, an old crone, smiling, friendly, perhaps male. I see a monkey, a cyclops. I see something like the face of God, fierce, terrible fire in his eyes. I see faces within faces, there's a sad face, a smiling face with eyelashes, long eyelashes, caring or coy, observant faces, mindful faces. They move and are suspended within a gel-like structure, flexible, moving in flux, moving slowly closer and further away from each other but never hopping over one another and taking on new positions, new relative positions relative to each other. The surface of the water ripples, diffracting the light, skewing their positions slightly relative to one another. I look down into the water from the bank, the wet, mulchy bank. I observe the sun flashing on the surface, the uneven surface which disintegrates and splits it into many loci. I see waves, and where there are waves, there is a mover. I see a crater on the surface of the water formed [my] by the collision of a large hailstone. I see the hail sinking and collecting in the depths of the pool. I see the [Ignt] lightning reflecting, reflected in the surface.

[30 July 2023] After discussing this text with chatgpt for quite some time, I asked it to rewrite the above text:

In the midst of the present, amidst the raindrops' soothing sounds and the thunder's rumblings, I find solace in the inexorable march of time. The cursor moves slowly, but with ordained speed, guiding me forward into the future. My regrets linger in the past, and my fears loom in the unknown ahead. The past cradles my regrets, woven into the very fabric of my being, while the future remains a canvas of possibilities, yet to be shaped.

My mind projects into the uncharted future, engrossed in conjectures, concerns, and consternations. Fears linger conspicuously, weaving a web of uncertainty. Meanwhile, my essence reaches into the future, building upon the fragments of the past, anticipating the cycles of repetition that may define my tomorrow.

In my dream, family and friends raise enigmatic cheetahs, leashed like secrets waiting to be revealed. Are they deceitful, hiding their intentions behind enchanting masks? The vision unfolds on an ornate staircase, evoking a world of fantasy, where life points are gained and lost like players in a grand game.

Amidst the intricate tapestry of faces from my past, I perceive glimpses of God's fiery gaze, watching over it all. Within this ethereal canvas, faces meld and move, suspended in a gel-like structure. Flexible and in flux, they dance closer and then apart, never transgressing boundaries.

Gazing into the water, I witness the sun's reflection, disintegrating on the uneven surface, refracting light into a myriad of loci. Waves ripple and a mover emerges, guiding the transformation of the water's surface. A crater forms, evidence of a collision with a mighty hailstone, sinking and collecting in the depths below. Lightning illuminates the water's surface, a captivating dance of light and shadow.

In this enigmatic masterpiece, the artist explores the intricacies of existence, the passage of time, and the interplay between past, present, and future. The canvas becomes a portal to the subconscious, where dreams and fears converge, and God's presence looms large. Within the depths of the artwork lies a narrative of self-discovery and contemplation, urging the viewer to delve into the mysteries of the human experience and seek solace amidst life's uncertainties.