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Film image #67
2023, Acrylic on board, 30x30cm
[chatgpt 10 August 2023] Integration and Healing: Repetition can serve as a mechanism for integration and healing. By repeatedly engaging with these symbols, the artist could be working towards a greater understanding and acceptance of their own psyche. The process of creating art allows for a safe and controlled environment in which to explore and integrate challenging aspects of the self.

[31 January 2023] She is the youngest and she is scared of going through old age alone. Reassure her repeatedly, like do for you, like I do for you.

2024. What happens? I cannot tell you. Just know that something will occur, out of the ordinary, something will set it apart from all other occurrences.

Your death, contingent on the choices you make.

Come back to me, you are my sheep and you recognise my voice. I call you. You come back to to me.

Something will happen, in a garden, with a flower, rpeatedly repeatedly.

I am here. Now you are here.

A bleeding nipple. The watery paint, the water, burdbened burdened with colour, infused with colour, supplemented with colour, lands on the board, al lands on the surface, forming a dome of liquid, shiny, in temsion tension, reflecting a point of light, the water evaporated slowly, evaporates slowly, until what remains is a circle, a disc, of painy paint, making a slight slight bump on the surface with a small indentation in the center.

I see nipples and I see dicks, repeatedly, throughout the surface. There is even a dick that has some ejaculate coming out of it. The pattern is too accurate to be coincidence, to ignore. I feel ... I have ... it needs to be mentioned! ... or a breast lactating. My intention was to paint leaves and flowers in a garden, reatedly repeatedly, and I have ended up painting little nipples and dicks, repeatedly.

Is there a story in the accumulation of this these unintentional manifestations?

[1 February 2023] The sound of running water, the gentle rolling thunder, the impression of a battle, happening far away, great battles being fought, will our champion prevail?

Preconceived, precept, before, coming before. Providing, creating a space, providing an enclosure, the sound of spaces being prepared for things to come to knowledge, to manifest. Intuitions, the sound of intuitions.

The turmoil of the abyss, the creation of time, and scpace space, structures within stuctures structures, the womb, wombs, being prepared for the commencement of new life that was always already old, the commencement of new-old life, always already love, always already a sign that signifies beyond my horison of understanding, below the surface of my consciousness.

In the pool I go swimming, being guided by you, and I watch the formations in the rain. You help me to judge the the determinations, the re-determinations, the partitions, that were once all one.

Leaves, flowers, water, air, cloud, thunder, rain, blood, the nipples and dicks, covered in your blood, washed in your blood, wombs within wombs, fertilization, attemdant attendants.

The girl sits eating her lunch, waiting for her father to take her home. A feint impression in the open door approaches. Is it her father? She looks at the open door where her father will appear, and waits patiently. Far in the distance the silhouette of a figure emerges. Is it her father or something else? Will something else come before her fathers arrival? She sits and waits patiently, but she is being harassed by strange figures, feint fogures figures, that resist detection and determination, and description. They rub against her against her, they press against, they impose, they rape, they set upon her mind lewdly, confusingly, and she resists. She prays, but inevitably she starts to disintegrate.

Oh tiger! Thy frightful symmetry, your frightful symmetry, the effect the artwork has on me. What effect? Symmetry. What happens in the artwork, happens in my mind.

The spell, the effect, the leap, the risk.

My mind needs material influence, redetermination.

I have many times sensed something in the artwork trying to break out from the surface, trying to gain realisation. It seems intense in its desire, threatening, jeopardy.

Will I become what I look at? Will I start to desire what I look at?

Will the girl look away from the door? ... Is she looking at a painting outside? ... Is she looking through the open door onto the open door of the neighbouring building? ... a gallery, ... at a painting hagning hanging on the wall? ... and does not that painting look very similar to the the way I paint now?

the particles drifting further apart from each other, the advancing disintegration, ...

the dark god, the dog barks, alarm, sound the alarm